The Brunette Diaries

7 Movies To Watch With Your Loved One While Enjoying This Romantic Weather

Isn’t the weather just romantic? The cloudy sky, cold breeze, the damp atmosphere, everything about monsoon is romantic. You either feel like eating all the hot stuff in the kitchen or simply just cuddle up under a blanket in your bed. You can say this weather is perfect for ‘Netflix and Chill’ ;). We’ve got a movie list prepped up for you to binge watch it with your other half, special someone, your honey boo or whatever sweet adorable names you’ve got for them, being all snuggled up and simply enjoy these movies in the rains.

1) 50 first dates

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1SVxJZTgI4

50 First Dates is a warm yet funny love story. It is about a man who falls for a girl who suffers from short-term memory loss. She remembers only the days before her accident and she waked up believing it’s her birthday every day because she cannot remember anything beyond that day. So, this guy tries to woo her every single day, prays that she falls in love with him for that day and most importantly, he loves her without any conditions.

2) P.S. I Love You

This movie might make you shed a few tears but is surely worth watching. It is about a young widow who starts her life afresh with the help of ten notes that her late husband has left for her.

3) A Walk To Remember

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R3b19svqbls

It is a heart-wrenching yet beautiful story of a guy who falls in love with a girl who has a terminal disease, and how the couple spends their last days together. P.S. – Keep a tissue box handy.

4) Shakespeare In Love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gk1rTKB6ZF8

This movie depicts Shakespeare as a struggling playwright/actor who is out of ideas and searching for a muse. That’s when he meets Viola de Lesseps, an aspiring stage actress who loves Shakespeare’s plays but must pose as a man to follow her dream because women aren’t allowed to act. The two have an instant connection, and the comedy of errors that follows ends up inspiring Romeo and Juliet. Again, this love story isn’t true, but it’ll make you see Shakespeare’s most famous play in a whole new light.

5) Love Aaj Kal

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dLH1gmk9_iE

A couple part their ways because they move to different places to pursue their career. But they say it right, love knows no boundaries, and the distance actually makes them realise their feelings for each other.

6) The Notebook

This is one of the movies you can watch again and again with your partner and still not feel bored. The story is set in 1940s where a young and not-so-affluent man falls in love with a rich woman. Soon, they are separated because of their social differences. What happens next? Well, you need to watch the movie for that.

7) About Time

From the man behind Love Actually, Notting Hill and Bridget Jones’s Diary comes this uplifting flick about a young man who realizes he has the ability to time travel. A wonderful reminder to cherish each and every day (and also that Rachel McAdams is amazing in everything).

Please tell us your favorite romantic movie to watch with your partner in the comment section below <3

Signs Your Partner Is Negging You And How Toxic It Is In A Relationship!

First off, Negging isn’t cool and no one should put up with a person’s negging. It is done purely to put a person down so much against their will to get what they want out of you. It can also be said as a form of manipulation and that is very toxic in any relationship!

What exactly is negging?

Negging is an act of emotional manipulation whereby a person makes a deliberate backhanded compliment or otherwise flirtatious remark to another person to undermine their confidence and increase their need of the manipulator’s approval.

Why Negging is an Actual Form of Abuse in Relationships?

Abuse comes in many shapes and forms, sometimes it’s not easy to spot, and sometimes it might not even come across as abuse, but all abuse, no matter the form, takes an emotional toll. One form of verbal abuse is known as negging. It occurs when an individual makes a backhanded compliment or insult that is designed to undermine that person’s confidence while simultaneously giving the insulter attention as they strive for their approval. In other words, one partner is constantly putting down the other one to get attention.

So now we know what negging is and many of us, who are in a relationship might’ve remembered many things their partners have said, which may be negging, if not so sure yet, read these few signs which will tell you whether you are in a toxic relationship or not!

1) They’re Narcissist

People who are never wrong while they put everyone down and talk themselves UP, are infact, NARCISSIST. A narcissist might seem ‘open‘ with you but in reality, they just love to talk about themselves, and aren’t actually interested in what’s going on in your life. If there is… a lack of vulnerability or sharing of true feelings or interests, not only can this start to paint the picture of what may be a narcissist, but you (might be) being negged.

2) Their compliments are always backhanded

“Wow, you’re actually pretty smart!” or “You can be so beautiful when you have makeup on!” By pointing out a negative, the (one being negged) focuses on the flaw and starts trying to fix it and gain their partner’s approval. If your partner seems to exclusively give you backhanded compliments that leave you feeling hurt and puzzled instead of bolstered and happy, that could mean they’re negging you.

3) They compare you to their exes

Occasionally mentioning an ex when it’s relevant is totally normal in a relationship. But if you’re being constantly compared to an ex by your partner, it’s probably because they’re trying to make you feel insecure and second-best as a way to make you want to ‘prove yourself‘ by sticking around. Not only they are feeding negative thoughts about your ownself into your mind but also manipulating you to be in a way your partner wants you to be.

4) They’re always so busy

“Sorry babe I’m busy doing work”, “Hey I can’t meet I’m too busy” Obviously, sometimes people are just genuinely too busy to hang out. But if you’re seeing someone who is always too busy for you and makes no real effort to meet up or plan dates, that’s a red flag. Claiming to be busy all the time is a desperate attempt to show their pseudo-importance.

5) You’re the butt of the joke

Having to be able to joke around your partner and sharing laughs is great for a healthy relationship but constantly being the topic to be joked about, whether your insecurities or your habits and appearance can put your self-confidence down under the bus. If your partner often uses you as the butt of the joke that could be their way of trying to subtly put you down while passing it off as ‘humor’.

What to do if you are being negged?

If you have come to notice about your partner’s backhand compliments or jokes, or how busy their schedule is, the best you can do is to have a one-on-one conversation with them about this. You need to address the elephant in the room or it’ll damage you mentally.

Your partner’s reaction will say it all: if they’re shocked, upset, and willing to work on their behavior, then it might be worthwhile to give them a chance. But if your partner dismisses your feelings and refuses to take any blame, that’s your cue to GTFO of the relationship before their controlling, manipulative behavior escalates.

We hope this article helped you, share it with your friends, you never what really goes on inside any happy looking relationship, right?

Is living-in before marriage a cool idea?

In Indian society, especially among the traditionalists, living-in may be considered as taboo, but many individuals from free spirited societies find it a convenient way of getting acquainted with their partners in a profound sense. But what do youngsters feel about this? Has the shift of western culture into the Indian subcontinent changed the way people perceive marriage? We met five youngsters and asked them if they would live-in with their partners before marriage. We requested them to keep the Indian culture aside while answering this and talk only based upon their personal morals. Let us take a look at a few snippets of what these youngsters had to say about this.

(Also read – Bollywood actresses who got pregnant before marriage)

Safana Abdul is a storyboard artist who is currently single and feels that the only factor that could influence whether or not she should live-in with her partner will be the potency of their commitment. “If I know that the commitment with my partner is strong enough for marriage, I wouldn’t mind living-in with him. But only if he gives me an assurance that he will marry me in the future. My family wouldn’t be alright with it, as generalised, but I would do what is fair and what I feel is right in the end.”

(Also read – Contemplating an arranged marriage?)

22-year-old student counsellor Divya Sajnani is currently single, but is open to the idea of living-in as well. “I think it’s a great idea. First of all, you get the sense of independence, away from family. Only if you stay with a person for a longer time will you get to know whether or not you are compatible with him, whether you will get bored of each other, whether common sense and logic will prevail in your decisions as a couple. There will be like a ‘preview’ to all these problems before you actually take the plunge into marriage, which is a big decision!”

(Also read – Steps to get a guy to fall in love with you)

30-year-old Jayavardhan Verma has been dating for about a year now and says that he is happy to have a girl who is open minded like him. “I think it is a great idea to live-in with my girl. She is quite open-minded and she would consider it if I would make such a decision. We aren’t too keen on getting married in the near future, so it is an option.”

Daisy Leivon too, was of the opinion that living-in is a great opportunity to explore interests and motives of your partner. “I totally believe that living-in with your partner is completely different from dating. You don’t know someone until you live with him. All the tolerance levels, interests, motives and everything else that comes with living together are put to the test, rather than just the promises that a couple make at the marriage altar.”

(Also read – Mistakes that can ruin new love)

So we’ve had four liberalist points of view which say a lot about how things have changed here in India. The fifth interviewee, however, was one who was quite firm about his beliefs and morals and says that he will not compromise in this area. Aakash Parekh was strongly opposing the idea of a live-in relationship. “The institution of marriage is sacred. Its purpose cannot be defeated by impatience. Marriage is something you have to wait for and treasure, not something you practise for with a partner and then give it a try! Marriage is special. I would never want to lose the essence of marriage by living-in with someone. My wife is going to be the only one with whom I will live… not my girlfriend. I’m sorry; my girlfriend doesn’t have my consent to live with me. If she loves me, she will have to wait to marry me! If she doesn’t have the patience to wait, then she probably never was the right girl for me.”

With most people living a life of compromise, based on what they feel is right and not what ethics have taught them, it is hard to draw a line of morality. But in the end, who am I to draw a line? Or who is anyone who spoke here? Everyone has freewill, but I would only put in a proposal for everyone to weigh out the pros and cons of anything before they jump into it.