The Brunette Diaries

Love In The Time Of Social Media

Gone are the days when people used to write letters to each other, they met in small cafes for dates, recharged their mobile with SMS pack to send text messages to their loved ones and much more. Well, only an old school romantic like me can relate to this.

It’s all in the past now. With the emergence of social media, the definition of love has changed. It’s more of using WhatsApp to send the first message to your crush, video calling, using Instagram to check out the pictures and much more.

We bring to you some of the pointers that tell us how love is gauged in the time of Social Media.

Likes, Comments, Favorites

The whole game of likes, comments and favorites can lead to insecurity and jealousy. The number of likes and comments on your crush’s post can lead to jealousy which leads to feelings of sadness and irritation. People even upload pictures or update their SM accounts on a daily basis just to draw the attention of their loved ones.

Last seen on Whatsapp

“Why was he up till 3 a.m, who was he talking to”. These questions crop up in the mind when people see their loved ones online for long hours. It gets nastier when someone hides their last seen and it leads to doubts and fights among couples.

PDA on Social Media

Bollywood celebs like Deepika Padukone and Ranveer Singh are known for PDA on social media and giving their followers #CoupleGoals. It is cute but on the other hand, it leads to expectations among couples to indulge in PDA. They think that if they don’t show their love to the world on Social Media, there is no social acceptance.

DP’s on Social Media

Display pictures on social media can change the whole game. If you post a picture with your ‘best friend’, your partner can get jealous or if you hide your DP from someone, you get anxiety issues. People start thinking if their partner is hiding something and then it leads to trust issues.

Love is a beautiful feeling and associating it with such things makes it lose its meaning. So guys, go out, love your partner with no apprehensions and enjoy this beautiful feeling.

Valentine’s Week: 5 Places In Mumbai To Celebrate Valentine’s Day

Every year all the people who are in love wait for this day. But if it’s your first Valentine’s with your long time crush and you want it just perfect – we are here to help you.

While you are proposing someone or taking someone out on a date we will give you with some exotic place where you can celebrate your valentine’s day.

Let’s take a look at a few restaurants you can choose from to impress all this Valentine’s Day date.

1. Olive Bar and Kitchen, Khar

USP: Great Valentine’s Day Party, nice music and a treat to match your partner’s foot in a romantic dance.

2. Gostana, Bandra West

USP: Hands down, the best place to relax in peace, enjoy yummy burgers, read together with your favourite book.

3. Pali Village Cafe, Pali Hill

USP: A quiet romantic candlelight dinner with an array of wonderful dishes. The vintage and rustic ambiance is an added plus point.

4. Cafe Mangii, Powai

USP: Guilt-free, yummy pizzas and wine. This particular outlet from the many of the chain, has a beautiful lake facing seats.

5. Bayview, Colaba

USP: The beautiful sea outstretched, Gateway of India view from The Strand Hotel rooftop and cheap alcohol and candle light dinner.

Do let us know what are your plans for this Valentine in the comment section below. For more updates from the world of love stay tuned to the brunette diaries.

College Dating Tips Every Guy Needs To Know

College is a world of its own. It has its own laws, its favourites, and its own culture to say the least. Perhaps the biggest benefit of being part of college life is the endless cycle of dating that goes on. Truth be told, there will never be a time in your life where you’ll meet so many people and have a chance to put your dating skills to the test. As a guy you’d want to maximize the chances of getting a good girlfriend. So, cash in on these chances by learning these college dating tips.

1. There’s No Need To Panic

Panic isn’t cool. In case you don’t have a girlfriend in college, no problem. Stay calm. There’s always time to get one. Build a diverse group of friendships and be confident about yourself. Remember, freaking out only makes the situation worse. Plus, who would want to be in the company of a guy who is low on confidence and doubts his very existence.

2. Think Different

You’ll usually meet many people in college, some similar in nature, some different. If you were to ask me, always follow the advice “similarity breeds contempt”. You don’t exactly want to date a shadow self. Try to find new experiences and new people who’ll give you new moments to savour. Of course, the difference can’t be as profound as chalk and cheese, but the right mixture of similarities and differences can be the perfect foil for a budding love story.

Also read: Online Dating Tips That Every Digital Dater Needs To Know

3. Do Something Together

Find a common goal or interest and get things in motion. Investing time in such an activity can strengthen the bond that you two share, and yeah, sparks can fly. If you don’t believe me, then ask the scientists that have been working their butt off in labs to prove this phenomenon.

4. Authenticity Is Always Appreciated

Ever come across a person in life who believes in the theory “fake it till you make it”? Well, guess what, girls have a sense for the real and the fake much more than guys do. Eventually, they will be able to see through you. So, it’s always preferable to be your natural self. Of course, it doesn’t mean you act like a moron.

Also read: 8 Relationship Mistakes That You Need To Take Seriously

5. Add A Cool Quotient

Now, by this I don’t really mean changing what you truly are. Just keep a tab of the latest trends, dress up appropriately, and improve yourself in every way possible. Girls love a guy who takes good care of his appearance. This way, you can be cool and also impress the chicks.

Also read: Style check for teen boys

Now that your dating tips are in place, go ahead and play the field. And don’t forget what Darwin stated “Survival of the fittest.”

What Does Tattoo Mean To A Person?

On World’s Tattoo Day, let us all share our stories and experiences about why we got inked, what importance does a tattoo hold in our lives. Getting inked is a tradition, followed since centuries, it holds great importance, many tattooed their victories in war, some tried to hold on to their lost dear ones onto their skin, it may be a hip culture for a lot of people now, and for others tattoos are the stories they can’t narrate themselves.

There are three reasons to as why people get inked:

1) Memories

Have you ever lost a pet that you grew up with? Lost your parent or a best friend? If yes, you will understand the pain of the loss. The memories will always haunt us, you can’t escape it, you only have to accept it and move on and tattoos help people do that. Getting those same memories skin deep makes you feel like you’re carrying them onto your life ahead with you. It is more than preserving something for eternity.

2) Art

Art has many shapes and forms, it literally comes from anywhere and is shared through any medium. Some paint it on a canvas or a wall, dance on a stage or streets, cook for their families or in a restaurant, art is simply everywhere. Tattoos are a form of art. People share stories through their art of tattoos. It is as our bodies are a piece of blank canvas and we’re painting it full of colours and depicting our emotions.

3) Love/Passion

It basically summarizes why people with ink, get inked. Their love or passion makes them ink it deep in their souls onto their bodies. It can be a quote very dear to you, an old photograph, your parent’s name or even an important date, it can be anything that you’re absolutely passionate about!

Here, at TBD, many of our team members have got really special tattoos onto their souls. Each tells a different story, you can say it’s a peek through a curtain into their life.

1) The big boss of our team is a mysterious person of us all, but her tattoos speak for themselves. She is an old-school book lover (Bibliophile tattoo) but is also fascinated with all the mysterious theories of our world. She knows that in life you need to write your own story and hence the “Quote-Unquote: Life is unwritten make your own quotes”. She lost her grandfather whom she was very close to and chose to get his birth year and the year he died, to be inked on her skin forever, cherishing his memories.

2) Our next teammate is everyone’s favorite lil bundle of joy, she says, “I am a hardcore believer of karma. I think we should get a tattoo of something that we learn throughout our lives and want to take to the grave. It’s an endless knot of karma which means you cannot escape your karma unless you do it without expectations!”.

3) This next human is known for her baby face and an always excited nature. She got stars inked on her neck. She loves being random and tries new experiences. “An always up for an adventure” kinda gal, so when her girlies would get ear piercing, she got herself a bunch of stars inked.

4) Lastly, I got this tattooed for my mother (quite evident). It was six years ago when she fell sick terribly. It was a moment when doctors had told us to bid our goodbyes to her, but God smiled upon her and she survived. It was mother’s day when she came home post her discharge and wanted to tell her how much she means to me and thus got this inked on that very same day.

We encourage you to share your stories with the world, write to us at [email protected]

Signs that he is falling in love with you

Men aren’t always good at expressing emotions, but if you are alert enough you can pick up these cues from him that suggest he is falling in love with you.

You must be able to pick up cues because he won’t always say it

He sends you text messages for no reason

The more he sends you messages, the more he cares about you. It just goes on to show how love-drunk he is. He may vie for your attention when he sends you mundane messages. Do not ignore them. Take them as a cue that he is falling for you.

He calls you just to hear your voice

He just loves to call you. He cannot resist calling you even if he doesn’t have a reason. He wants to hear your voice. He may call you and maybe not even speak much, but listen to what you have to say!

He texts fewer people

You may figure that he is giving you his sole attention and you may wonder why and how come. Understand that he has sobered down his social interaction because he is beginning to become love struck.

You hear his buddies giving him a hard time of late

You may hear a hint when he talks about how his friends feel he’s been behaving differently. They’re actually making astute observations about subtle behavioural changes that you may not have picked up on.

He sometimes talks rubbish just so that you can ask him what’s wrong

This can be at the later stages of being love struck. He tends to talk rubbish with the expectation that you ask him if everything is alright. He may be seeking attention. No guy says that straight up. Guys are masters of emotion masking.

He will text you just to stay in touch all day

If you see such quirky behaviour in a guy, do not be repulsed and wonder what’s wrong. You are wrong! ‘You’ happened to him. He cannot resist the thought of you and is falling in love.

Mistakes that can ruin new love

Comfort levels differ in the initial stages of love. Understanding may be present in the relationship, but being able to perceive problems and personalities early, may be harder than you expect. Usually, couples tend to ruin new love by getting into things too quick. Let us look at a few common mistakes that couples make in new love:

Let your feelings develop and do not force them

Asking for help too often

You can ask him for help once in a while, but if you do it too often, you may make him question your intentions. He may believe you are taking advantage of him. Do not behave like he is your husband already, this will scare him away.

Double dates

Double dating can be fun to show off your new boyfriend. But if you keep doing this, he may misunderstand you. He may believe that you want him around just as eye candy.

Overdressing

Do not be a diva every time you meet him. Men perceive this as fake. In a new relationship, it is important to be yourself and not fake so he is not scared away.

Cribbing

Usually, women have a habit of setting things straight right at the beginning of the relationship so that they are not taken for granted later. Men are repulsed by women who crib about things they do even without knowing them that well.

White lies

At the beginning of a relationship, it is important to build trust steadily. You cannot expect him to trust you from the word go. As you build this trust, even the small white lies that you tell can ruin this trust.

Physical involvement

Be slow when it comes to committing to certain things. Do not be hasty when it comes to being physically involved. Be patient, show that you love him and not his body.

When it comes to new relationships, be sure to take things slowly. For you do not know what you rush in to.

Falling in love too fast?

There are times when the first time you seen him, you know he is the one for you. You get hooked up with him and before you know it you are getting serious. Time to slow down! Contemplate whether it is too risky that things have gone so fast. Love is clearly a risk, but letting it become an absolute blind risk is unwise. Taking your time and getting well-acquainted with the other person is the right way to go. Let us look at some pointers which may help you understand the risk of falling in love too quickly.

Analyze and scrutinize

Humans are the only species who can reason what they do. There is time to reflect on every decision we take. Only time will bring out our true personality hidden under the cloak of infatuation. Therefore, it is imperative that you take your time to decide whether he is right for you to share your love with.

Love is patient

If you are falling in love, then let time grow your securities. Giving a relationship time to blossom will only help it stay healthy and long lasting. If you wait, your partner’s weaknesses will eventually surface, and you will be in a better position to decide whether you are willing to accept them.

Love doesn’t happen at first sight, infatuation does!

There are some who are under the impression that love happens even at first sight. This is untrue. Falling in love has a lot to do with your heart and not with outward appearances. Appearance is only a trigger for you to be attracted to someone’s personality. And so, the next time you feel a certain good-looking person is good at heart, think again!

Falling in love is a risk. This is a given. But are you making this high risk, blind-sky-diving-with-no-parachute risk? Fall in love with your head and your heart! Not just your eyes!

Steps To Get A Guy To Fall In Love With You

Are you looking to hook up with a guy who you’ve had your eye on for quite a long time? You may not feel confident to approach him… well, there’s your problem, in fact. If he ever notices that you lack confidence, it can be a real turn off to any guy. While most claim that there is something called love at first sight, we beg to differ. He can fall in love with the way you look, and have a crush on you, but love you? Love is something more meaningful and the term has been thrown around wrongly too often.

(Also read – Signs that he is falling in love with you)

So here we look at steps in which you can build up your confidence to walk up to the man of your dreams and make him fall head over heels for you.

Love yourself

Loving yourself is the first step towards being loved. If he sees that you love the way you look, he’ll perceive you to be confident. Everything we see and read on television and magazines gives us an unrealistic perception of what our bodies should look like. Instead, learn to love yourself just the way you are, and he will too.

(Also read – Mistakes that can ruin new love)

Love everything you do

Any boy will be much more likely to fall in love with you if you love what you do and feel more positive about the things in your life. If you make it known that you’re happy pursuing your interests, work, or career, then he’ll be more inclined to want to get to know you.

Melroy Day, a 21-year-old I.T. student feels that, “The biggest sickness society suffers from is ‘what will people say’. A girl who could get rid of this unreal expectation of society and love herself will be much more attractive to me.”

Get his attention

If you want a boy to love you, then you have to look like a fun person to be around. 19-year-old Maargi Mehta opines, “Whenever a guy sees you, you should have a big but genuine smile on your face, do something different, be fun to hang out with.”

Body language

You don’t want to be friend-zoned, do you? It’s important to get your body language right and not send him the wrong message from across the room. This can involve eye contact, standing upright and not showing any signs of nervousness.

Show something special

If you have a special talent, portray it. Highlight your strength and hide your weaknesses. He’ll love how you are different from others when you show him some skill that you may possess.

(Also read – Falling in love too fast?)

Be mysterious

Don’t give him a chance to get to know you completely. Make him want to come back for more. Don’t tell him every story you know, make him want to ask you things. Don’t show too much excitement and he will long to hear from you!

You have to be patient. Love doesn’t happen overnight, but it’s surely worth the wait, because it is beautiful.

Dos and don’ts of office romance

People often fall in love with someone with whom they spend hours on end, and share the same passion as them. Office is one such place where spending long hours bring two people close to each other. If you already like a person at your workplace, it is important for you to know certain dos and don’ts. Nobody wants to end up with a broken heart or join the list of unemployed people because of their carelessness.

Don’t pounce on married people

You might be attracted to a colleague who is married and you may even find him/her best suited for you. But leave this man/woman alone. It is important to hold on to the principle of not breaking a marriage for selfish reasons. Fancying someone and trying to own someone are two different things. You can fancy anyone and everyone in your imaginations, but you cannot have them in real life. So, better keep the idea of dating a married colleague at bay.

Cautious flirting

Flirt cautiously. Others could be watching you!

It is important to make sure you keep your desires behind closed doors. Brushing past the person or giving away broad smiles even for a lame joke lets the cat out of the bag. Remember that you are not the only one at work. Your colleagues can easily notice your unexpected enthusiasm for only one person. You should never create such unwanted speculative atmosphere; it brings you close to being the topic of office gossip, not love.

Look forward to responses

There is no point if the flirting continues only from your side. Unless you get a response you will not be able to confirm the feeling to be mutual. Try becoming friends with that person. Many people put on their friendly mask at office, so it is likely that the person might not even notice your existence at work. Therefore, laying the foundation by making yourself visible is essential.

Beware of your company law

Each company has its own policies, which is why it is crucial for you to know your company rules and regulations. The last thing you want is to lose your love and job at the same time. Allegations of misconduct can be made. Therefore, read the contract thoroughly before you end up in trouble.

Don’t indulge in lustful sessions at office

Keep your sexual encounters away from the office

There could be some rooms in your office that are vacant more often than not. This does not give you the liberty of using that room for your sexual escapedes. What if someone enters the room during one of your sexual encounters? You wouldn’t want a random colleague, or anyone for that matter, to see you offering your bosoms to your lover-colleague, right? Also, avoid stealing a kiss or using the parking lot for momentary pleasure. These are all risky, especially in a professional environment. So, keep your passion in control when you are in office.

What if someone sees you stealing a kiss?

Are you the only one?

What is the guarantee that the person is not flirting with other colleagues as well? It is very easy for them to take advantage of their sex appeal and try flirting with multiple co-workers. Therefore, ensure that you are risking for the right person. No one wants to end up embarrassed for being fooled with false emotions. Confirm each other’s love to be mutual with no other interference.